Monday, August 13, 2007


I stopped loving my ex-boyfriend over a year ago. However, I didn't do anything about my feelings at that time. I didn't discuss my feelings with anyone. I kept going on with life like nothing was wrong. I am not sure what I was waiting for. A sign that the I could relove him again. Not too sure. I guess mentally and emotionally I shut myself off towards him. We just lived together like roommates. Then I decided I couldn't physically go on with the relationship. That's when I had to end it.

I guess at an early age, I learned how to stop loving someone quickly. Maybe that comes from having so many people come in and out of my life in a short period. I do not enjoy not loving someone when you really should. It's a hard feeling to explain. In a beginning of a relationship, I have noticed that I start loving people early on. However, if for some reason the relationship is not working, I can stop loving them quickly. It's almost like I have a switch inside of me.....turn love on....turn love off. Sometimes I feel like Coldheart from the Care Bears.

I guess that's just who I am.

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